I don’t want to jump to conclusions but from speaking to Christian Nadé over the course of an hour and a bit it seems like he is in a pretty good place. It wasn’t that long ago he went public with his struggles with mental health, showing extreme bravery in offering such candid and honest reflections about the various challenges he has faced throughout his life. Both candid and honest he was with me too, but that was in between making a few lighthearted jokes and conversing with a smile. Throughout the chat Christian spoke with real energy and enthusiasm about topics ranging from how he ‘discovered himself’ and, looking in hindsight, the key moments of his career that led to struggles on the pitch.
‘When I left Hearts at 27 that’s when I tried to change and realised I’d been making some big mistakes,’ Christian said with cutting honesty.
After a promising start to his career in France with Troyes which led to an appearance for a star-studded French U21 side, it was a move to Sheffield United that, Christian said, showed early signs of his career going down the wrong path.
‘Money and fame attracts every kind of person. If you don’t already have a good entourage around you then it can be very difficult.’
Leaving France as a fresh-faced youthful extrovert, at that age he wanted to be able to enjoy the endless avenues and benefits that come with being a young footballer. Christian instead however found himself alone in a country he couldn’t speak the language of and without anybody to help keep him on track.
‘If I went to a club in France or a club where there were a lot of French-speaking guys, it would have been easy because they would have taken me under their wing. As soon as you go to a club where you don’t speak their language you go looking for people in the area who do, no matter who they are. You could start to surround yourself with the wrong crowd. Surround yourself with pretty much anyone that can speak the language, even if they are, for example, a drug dealer.’
Earning very good money at Sheffield, the wrong crowd well and truly leeched themselves onto Christian.
‘If I told you some of the things I did for people you wouldn’t believe it. I bought someone a new car who I obviously knew, but not enough for me to just buy them a car. I was very social back then, but now I am not at all. I surrounded myself with the wrong people and because of that I was scared to do it again so I ran away from people even if they had good intentions because it still worries me today if I pick the wrong person.’
Despite the initial teething problems off-field, at that point it didn’t have an enormous effect on his on-field performances. After being signed for Hearts in 2007 though, tipped to be the main-man up front, it was then the toxic attitude of those he surrounded himself with began to erode his view of himself and his place within the sport. Although Christian is quick to say his time at the Edinburgh club was enjoyable, he reflects back on his time at the club as a period of unfulfilled potential.
‘I loved my time at Hearts, but at the same time I feel I could’ve given so much more. I didn’t give everything I had and a feeling of not achieving everything I should have. That’s why now I actually think I’d make a good striker coach, I know everything you need to do to develop from being a talented young striker to a top striker because it’s absolutely everything I didn’t do.’
Christian places a lot of this down to the need for a subtle yet enormous (oxymoron, I know) mentality switch. It’s something that many professional athletes face at some point of their career, the transition of going from being regarded internally and externally as a promising young player with plenty of time to being someone that needs to deal with the pressures of delivering in the here and now. Without re-aligning your perception of your role within a team, the place you are in your career timeline and your overall career aspirations, this trap can be a costly one.
‘When I first played professionally all I thought about was football. I was watching the best strikers, watching their movement and I’d take advice from anybody that played in my position. I didn’t do that when I was at Hearts. I went in at Sheffield, the 8th choice striker so I tried to work my best and try harder every day. At Hearts I was signed as the number one striker and didn't work nearly hard enough. As far as I was concerned I wanted to be a professional footballer and I did that, I wanted to play in England and I did that, I wanted to play for my national team and I did that. After that I just didn’t make any more goals. It was the feeling that I’d worked 15 or 20 years to reach the goal I had set myself and to be honest I just wanted a rest, to enjoy it and embrace it.’
You get the feeling that Christian is pretty-self aware and his time at Hearts is something that has been closely considered and analysed. Although he admits that ‘complacency and arrogance totally played a part,’ it was complexly mixed with underlying fear and insecurity.
‘I’d be scared to touch the ball on the pitch, run away from the ball and pretend I was asking for it. I wouldn’t want to go out, I’d stay at home and as soon as I got there I’d just stay in my bedroom and not move. I really struggled with coming in as the star, the big guy. I knew I was going to be playing and thought I didn’t need to push myself, just do the minimum and I’d still be better than the second choice striker.’
Now thoroughly enjoying playing in South Ayrshire for Annbank United, not in spite of his mental health struggles but partly because of them, Christian feels he is in the best place he has been in years.
‘To be honest I discovered myself not long ago. I am far more stable in life, more focussed on what I am doing and have all the right people around me. All that has been a big change for me. Christianity has changed so much for me too because it’s all about love and forgiveness. I used to push everyone away from me. My life would be all about me, me, me and I wouldn’t care about what you think or at least pretend I didn’t. When you are a Christian you open yourself up to more people and listen to them. It’s hard to not realise it’s all about you as a footballer because people make it all about you and you start to believe it.’
As the conversation drew to a close, one thing that struck me about what Christian said was that the opening steps that helped increase his happiness and mental clarity are steps that aren’t always that difficult to obtain. Sometimes it is just the case of zooming in on what can often be there in front of you. in Christian’s case, it was with his relationships with the people closest to him.
‘Having the partner now that I have and having my family around me, these are two things that have helped me so so much.’
Quick-fire Questions
How would you describe yourself in three words?
Loving, happy and ambitious.
How would your family and friends describe you in three words?
Happy, caring and honest.
Introverted or Extroverted?
Introverted.
Best moment of career/life?
My first goal I scored where my Dad came to me from the stand and started to cry. It was the first time he’d got to watch me play.
Most challenging moment of your career/life?
When I had to prove to everybody else that a thing I was accused of wasn’t true. It made me so patient and before that I didn’t know I was a patient person. I wasn’t allowed to say anything for 6/7 months about it.
Biggest personality strength?
Overcoming adversity.
Biggest personality weakness?
I am very gullible!
Best piece of advice you have ever been given?
My Mum said that “the lie takes the lift, the truth takes the stairs.” Meaning the lie always comes first but the truth will follow shortly.
